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Overcoming your fears

When I look at my children all I can see is limitless potential. I can see everything they are going to be. But the thing that’s going to stop them, the one thing that’s going to stop them “becoming” who they’re meant to be and what they’re here for, is really simple…it’s fear. Fear. All fear is, when we break it down, it’s just a thought! Where does fear come from, what causes fear? It’s a thought that we’re not good enough. It’s a thought that I’m not worthy, it’s a thought that it’ll ever happen for me, it's a thought that it can happen for her but it’s not for me. All of these fears and judgements are things from our childhood and trapped emotions, from thought processes that we have had from childhood. Is this the mindset that you want for yourself and for your children?

If we always think the same thing, we’re creating a...

Dance like nobody's watching!

You are the role model for your children. Think about that for a minute. Are you minimising yourself to make others feel better? Are you hiding your light? Are you being authentic and true to yourself, and honest with yourself about what you want?  You get to inspire your child by being true to yourself and living to your fullest expression, every day, and I’m here to help you make the most of it.  You have one shot to raise a child, you don’t get a second chance. This is it. Before age 7 your children are developing a lens of how they see the world that they’ll use to run the rest of their lives on a 95% unconscious basis.

Be honest with yourself about what you want

Therefore, because 95% of your behaviour right now is happening on that unconscious basis, the majority of your parenting is just somebody else’s story that you have chosen to accept as fact, and that is now just playing...

Self care awareness 

Many of us know that as parents we have to prioritise self care in order to be able to take care of others. But if you're really honest, how many of these self care activities, the self-compassion things, are you actually doing? The importance of self care for mums cannot be overstated. Are you meditating, dancing, are you doing any of the self care ideas you read about or feel drawn to...or like most mums, are you doing nothing? A harsh lesson that we all have to learn if we want to grow and expand is that nobody is that nobody is coming to do this for you, and if you reach this point in your life and you're thinking this sucks, there has to be a better way. I promise you, there is!

 The real problem though, is that when we don't give love to ourselves, then we really don't have enough to give away to others. Disconnection from self and our own needs, leads to a lack of empathy for others.
When parents lack empathy they have often...

In this space we talk about mental health and emotional health, we talk about raising wholehearted children, we talk about the courage to change your life. I want to talk about the opportunity and the responsibility that you have as an adult, and as a parent, to shape your child’s mind, and to show them by your actions how to get courage and confidence. If any of you know any about the work that I do, I'm on a mission to impact a generation of children to live to their full potential, to become wholehearted, to help them have a childhood that perhaps they don't have to recover from as so many of us have to do as adults.  

How to change your life

The way I do that is a unique approach, so most of the work that I do is on the personal transformation and the undoing of the adult’s thought processes because when we change the way we think, we change the way we feel and that changes the way we behave. Then what I do is use increased attachment and...

The number one driver for people coming into my process is normally they want to have a better relationship with their children, to bond with their children and be more present because they are so overwhelmed. If you are in my space I am assuming you do you also want a more present and connected relationship with your children. If you ask yourself why can I not bond with my child, that is ultimately going to be defined by the relationship that you have with yourself because we can only meet others at the depths to which we have met ourselves.

 

I'm going to explain just a basic premise of it with my Circle of Raar, it’s a virtuous circle, it goes round more than once and it keeps going round. We have connection, compassion and courage, this is the premise of how people become wholehearted. We start with connection, it goes round to compassion and it finishes with courage.  Now when I say this is a virtuous circle what I mean is that we have to go...

How can I relax and enjoy parenting?

Can you imagine what kind of world we could live in if every single time we were an observer of our thoughts and instead of choosing negative things we chose to think about joy, about acceptance, about love? Let's talk about procrastination, hands up who loves to procrastinate like me, like to the point I will do so many other things and I will literally start scheduling things into my diary when I have a really important deadline coming up? Do you do that...if so, why? Because we have a thought or belief system running in the background, “You’re not good enough, because that's not gonna be any good, you’re not gonna make it”, or when people laugh at us.

All of these stories, these thoughts that we are choosing to think, Now I know that we did not learn the gift of flight by thinking about sinking, you don't learn how to swim by thinking about drowning, am I right? Our brain has this real negative...

Change negative thoughts to positive 

Today I want to talk about negative patterns of thinking , our responsibility and choices. How to change negative thinking, blocks, and limiting beliefs and be a calm and happy parent, how to break bad habits without yelling. It’s about choice, it's something I’ve been digging into this week with my own growth. It blows my mind how many choices we have. The choices that we have, that we have the opportunity to get to make, the choices that we don’t get to make, and sometimes the choices we’re procrastinating on or avoiding.

What are the choices that I’m not taking, where are the opportunities that I have, what are the choices that I’m avoiding, and what’s going on with me underneath that? If you’ve been in my space for a while you’ll know I like to dig into things.

It’s always about the thoughts, and what thoughts do we sometimes not take responsibility for. I know that if...

Emotional wellness is vital

Self love practices; everyone talks about self love, self esteem, self worth, self acceptance, emotional wellbeing, filling your cup. You know these things, but are you doing them? Are you meditating, dancing, journaling, writing, painting, singing, performing, creating, being in nature, spending adult time with friends? Are you doing any of the things that light you up and feed your soul?

Learning to love yourself more

No one is coming to save you, nobody’s going to do this for you. If you’ve reached this point in your life and think there has to be a better way, there is! And it comes from ways of thinking and ways of feeling. Compassion for others require compassion for self, especially as mothers. Compassion for yourself, self acceptance, self love. When you’ve filled your cup and are taking care of your health and wellbeing; eaten good food, not drunk two bottles of wine. When you’re getting enough...

Do you have low self esteem based on fear of failure?

Want to know how to boost your child’s confidence? Show them that failure and making mistakes are just a part of the learning process, and you will build their self esteem. In my programs for building confidence in children through music, I talk a lot about building confidence through being the model not the mirror. The aim is not to reflect back but to stand in our values and model the example to our children. See this as a challenge in your life and your parenting, you can and you will rise to it!

Building confidence

When Freddie Mercury sang ‘We Are The Champions’ he was saying in front of the whole world what he wanted. And nothing anyone ever created or achieved was gained without failure, perseverance, self-belief and by getting up each time you fall, and going again. Will you make mistakes? Yes. Will you fail big time? Yes.

 
The key is to find the gold in your...

Want to know how to boost your child’s self confidence?

You don’t learn to swim by thinking about drowning. You won’t build confidence by thinking about fear. Focusing yours and your child’s mind on the power you hold in any given scenario is the best way to empower yourselves, and give your child a confidence boost that lasts. Are you ready to change the way you see things forever and raise a wholehearted, confident child or confident children who can live and love to their fullest expression?

Do you catastrophise? Do you find yourself thinking ‘what if..’ and then listing all the potential negative outcomes in your head? This just sets your mind in a loop of fear-based thinking, lacking confidence, and low self esteem. As an adult and a parent you have a responsibility to shape your child’s mind, and to build their self-esteem, and give them the tools to continue to build their own self...